Sticker Shock: They Shoot Electric Horsemen, Don't They?

November 23, 2004

They Shoot Electric Horsemen, Don't They?

Hi I'm the happiest Vocoder ever. I'm the golden pond of Vocoders, minus the Fonda boat wipe-out, plus the frog who likes to suck face at the arcade. This is the hip hepbernstein bear with a gloopful of honey on his paw. As Flavor Flav once said, "Put it on your toast." This an R&B vocoder. Not Robby the Robot (who admittedly was a tool--and I like robots, the android adenoids and the Karel Capeks and the newts and the efts--read War with the Newts my friends!). But listen how this fucker straight up shimmers and stipples. You haven't lived until you eat cereal with the one you lurve (like-like, lust, I mean there's got to be SOMETHING there) in the morning to Dayton's "Sound Of Music." Clap that spoon across the room. Or if alone, try Sister Sledge's "Thinking Of You" and just imagine the whole Kix and canoodle.

When I spoke with Carl Cowens (howdy Carl!) of the Dayton Sidewinders he said the nephew of the guy from Dayton was in his living room (or down the street?) playing video games. Carl was Roger Troutman's bodyguard and used to make hardware store runs for extra Talk Box tubing before all the chug wumps stole it for beer bongs. Surplus Talk Box tubing is a hygienic necessity, with all that drool residue and encrusted morning mucous. Peter Frampton said when he was on the Today Show nobody wanted to squawk it up after Al Roker. Anyway, rap media and media in general should be ashamed of the lack of ink and inch given to Roger's passing--beyond the cursory RIP, EPMD business or the fact he is the biggest tube-chewing badass in the California Love video. I saw Roger being carried on stage in an electric suit in 87 when they headlined for Starpoint ("What You Been Missing"), RJ's Latest (a favorite of Mrs. Hackleschmackle) and Choice MCs (Hi Fresh Gordon "drum computer solo", Hi "Mayberry Mix." Say Floyd --could you lower my ears and shave Zapp in the back of my head?). And the electric horseman carried Roger's jockstrap. And they did "Computer Love" TWICE IN A ROW. One of the Zapp ladies told the Charlotte Coliseum, "It sounds so nice we're gonna do it twice." And thanks to their technology, Roger got busy with the crazy straw. And at Roger's funeral, his nephew sang Amazing Grace" on the Talk Box. Damn.

Posted by Dave at November 23, 2004 09:19 PM


	« IMAGINARIUM \| \| THANKS FOR THE FREE LAND! » November 23, 2004 They Shoot Electric Horsemen, Don't They? Hi I'm the happiest Vocoder ever. I'm the golden pond of Vocoders, minus the Fonda boat wipe-out, plus the frog who likes to suck face at the arcade. This is the hip hepbernstein bear with a gloopful of honey on his paw. As Flavor Flav once said, "Put it on your toast." This an R&B vocoder. Not Robby the Robot (who admittedly was a tool--and I like robots, the android adenoids and the Karel Capeks and the newts and the efts--read War with the Newts my friends!). But listen how this fucker straight up shimmers and stipples. You haven't lived until you eat cereal with the one you lurve (like-like, lust, I mean there's got to be SOMETHING there) in the morning to Dayton's "Sound Of Music." Clap that spoon across the room. Or if alone, try Sister Sledge's "Thinking Of You" and just imagine the whole Kix and canoodle. When I spoke with Carl Cowens (howdy Carl!) of the Dayton Sidewinders he said the nephew of the guy from Dayton was in his living room (or down the street?) playing video games. Carl was Roger Troutman's bodyguard and used to make hardware store runs for extra Talk Box tubing before all the chug wumps stole it for beer bongs. Surplus Talk Box tubing is a hygienic necessity, with all that drool residue and encrusted morning mucous. Peter Frampton said when he was on the Today Show nobody wanted to squawk it up after Al Roker. Anyway, rap media and media in general should be ashamed of the lack of ink and inch given to Roger's passing--beyond the cursory RIP, EPMD business or the fact he is the biggest tube-chewing badass in the California Love video. I saw Roger being carried on stage in an electric suit in 87 when they headlined for Starpoint ("What You Been Missing"), RJ's Latest (a favorite of Mrs. Hackleschmackle) and Choice MCs (Hi Fresh Gordon "drum computer solo", Hi "Mayberry Mix." Say Floyd --could you lower my ears and shave Zapp in the back of my head?). And the electric horseman carried Roger's jockstrap. And they did "Computer Love" TWICE IN A ROW. One of the Zapp ladies told the Charlotte Coliseum, "It sounds so nice we're gonna do it twice." And thanks to their technology, Roger got busy with the crazy straw. And at Roger's funeral, his nephew sang Amazing Grace" on the Talk Box. Damn. Posted by Dave at November 23, 2004 09:19 PM